From The Onion:

After two earlier rounds of clumsy, uncoordinated layoffs, Wiley Advertising manager Hank Strauss finally hit his pink-slip-issuing stride Friday with the "effortless" dismissal of one quarter of his remaining workforce.

"By the time I got to the IT department, I was really feeling it," the 51-year-old said after terminating two dozen full-time employees without breaking a sweat. "I don't know, it was like everything fell into place: my timing, my reflexes, everything."

Added Strauss, "What a rush."

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